Surviving Grad School in the COVID-19 Era Pandemic: A Tale of Zoom, Pajamas, & Coffee Mugs doubling as Wine Glasses

Embarking on the journey of graduate school for professional counseling is a transformative experience, filled with challenges that shape not only your academic prowess but also your personal and professional growth. Now, throw in the unprecedented challenges posed by the COVID-19 pandemic (or seemingly apocalypse, TP shortage and all), and the journey becomes a true test of resilience and adaptability. Seriously. Picture this: you, your laptop, and a questionable amount of caffeine, forming an unholy trinity as you navigate the virtual maze of academia. Forget about the hallowed halls of knowledge; we're talking about conquering the Wild West of the web, the kingdom of online classes where the only dress code is "business on top, party down below." In this chronicle of academic survival, join me as we explore the peculiar journey of grad school during the pandemic – a saga filled with muted microphones, accidental screen shares of embarrassing desktop backgrounds, and the occasional existential crisis during a 2 AM submission deadline.

In this post, I will be sharing the hurdles faced during my graduate studies in counseling/clinical psychology amidst the pandemic and the invaluable lessons learned along the way. And if you too have ever found yourself questioning the legitimacy of your degree while surrounded by the comforting ambiance of your living room, this one's for you. So, grab your favorite mug (not judging what’s in it) because this is the caffeinated, unfiltered tale of eight personal grad school lessons learned during a pandemic – where Zoom fatigue is real, but so is our resilience!

1. Balancing Act: Juggling Studies, Internships, and Life all while shifting to classes online (initially my personal Hell)

Lessons Learned: Prioritize and Set Boundaries & Flexibility is Key

Graduate school demands a delicate balance between coursework, internships, sometimes (and in my personal case) full-time work, and personal life. I learned the importance of setting clear priorities and boundaries, allowing me to excel academically while still maintaining a semblance of work-life harmony. I also learned, sudden shift to virtual learning brought forth a myriad of challenges too, from technological hiccups to the absence of in-person interactions. Therefore I also learned to embrace flexibility, adapting my learning style, and finding creative ways to connect with professors and fellow students.

2.  Telehealth Transition: Bridging the Gap in Clinical Practice &  Bridging Theory and Real-World Application

Lessons Learned: Compassion Knows No Boundaries & Embrace the Learning Curve

Moving from in-person counseling sessions to telehealth presented a unique set of challenges. I discovered the power of compassion in bridging the gap between physical distances. The virtual realm didn't diminish the therapeutic connection; it merely shifted its form. This also opened my eyes to transitioning from theory to clinical practice can be overwhelming. I discovered the significance of embracing the learning curve, recognizing that each client interaction (via zoom or face to face) is an opportunity for growth. It's okay not to have all the answers, as long as you are committed to learning and adapting.

3. Client Diversity/Cultivating Cultural Competence & Empathy in Crisis: Navigating Clients Struggles Amidst a Global Crisis

Lesson Learned: Cultural Competence is a Lifelong Learning Process & Empathy is a Healing Balm

Encountering clients from diverse backgrounds emphasized the importance of cultural competence. I learned that cultivating an understanding of different cultural perspectives is an ongoing process, requiring humility, curiosity, and a genuine commitment to learning from each unique encounter. The pandemic also brought forth unprecedented mental health challenges for clients. From this, I learned that empathy is a potent healing balm, providing solace to individuals grappling with uncertainty, fear, and grief. Compassion became a cornerstone in navigating clients through these tumultuous times.

4. Self-Care in Crisis: Prioritizing Mental Well-being

Lesson Learned: Self-Care is Non-Negotiable

The pandemic underscored the importance of prioritizing mental well-being. I learned that practicing what I preach is essential – self-care is not an indulgence but a necessity, especially in times of crisis. Graduate school can be emotionally taxing. I discovered the importance of prioritizing self-care to prevent burnout. Whether it's engaging in hobbies, seeking supervision, or fostering a strong support network, self-care is a non-negotiable aspect of maintaining mental and emotional well-being. Especially when the world is essentially on fire.

5. Digital Boundaries: Balancing Professionalism in Virtual Spaces

Lesson Learned: Establish Clear Boundaries

Navigating the blurred lines between personal and professional life in virtual spaces required establishing clear boundaries (haha that’s why I had taken a three year hiatus from social media along with my six year hiatus from here) I learned that intentional delineation between work and personal spaces fosters a healthier balance and professional integrity.

6. Supervision Challenges: Embracing Constructive Feedback & Adapting to Remote Oversight

Lesson Learned: Feedback is a Catalyst for Growth & Technology is a Lifeline for Supervision

Supervision sessions, while at times challenging, became instrumental in my growth as a counselor. I embraced constructive feedback as a catalyst for improvement, recognizing that vulnerability and a willingness to learn enhance one's professional competence. Also, during these sometimes challenging sessions for me, remote supervision became a norm, and I discovered the importance of leveraging technology to maintain a strong connection with supervisors. Zoom proved to be valuable tools for constructive feedback and professional development (also it was a life line when I was having that aforementioned 2AM deadline existential crisis with my thesis).

7. Professional Ethics: Navigating the Ethical Maze & Advocacy in Crisis/Elevating the Role of Mental Health Professionals

Lesson Learned:Ethical Decision-Making is a Cornerstone

The pandemic emphasized the vital role of mental health professionals. I learned to advocate for the importance of mental health and destigmatize seeking support, recognizing that our profession plays a crucial part in the collective healing process. As a future counselor, ethical decision-making is paramount. I learned to navigate the ethical maze by prioritizing client welfare, seeking supervision when needed, and staying informed about ethical guidelines. Upholding professional integrity is non-negotiable.

8. Lifelong Learning: The End is Just the Beginning & Embracing an Unknown Future

Lesson Learned: Resilience is a Graduation Cap & View Graduation as a Starting Point

Graduating from graduate school doesn't mark the end of learning; it signifies a new beginning. I believe lifelong learning is inherent in the counseling profession. I approach each day as an opportunity to absorb new insights, refine skills, and deepen my understanding of the human experience. With this being said, ever-changing landscape of the pandemic taught me to embrace uncertainty and view adaptability as a superpower. I learned that, as a counselor, flexibility and the ability to thrive in ambiguity are essential qualities.

In closing for me, graduating amidst the challenges of the pandemic became a testament to resilience. I learned that challenges don't negate achievements; they amplify the strength and determination required to earn that degree, and graduation cap. As we navigate these uncharted waters, let these lessons serve as guiding lights for future counselors facing unprecedented challenges in the ever-evolving landscape of mental health. To my other pandemic graduate survivors, raise that coffee mug (regardless of what’s actually in it) for a well deserved cheers!

Were attending grad school or college during the abysmal COVID-19 years? Feel free to share your thoughts and experiences down in the comments section! I’d also love to hear from new grad students as well.

Later babes!

Xx, Bree

Suit Shopping Adventures with Adam: Where Romance Meets Tailoring

There are few moments in wedding planning as iconic as dress shopping—cue the “Say Yes to the Dress” montages, tearful moms, and glasses of bubbly. But let’s talk about the unsung hero of wedding prep: suit shopping. That’s right. It is simply one of those quintessential wedding tasks that often gets overshadowed by the glitz and glamour of dress shopping. But let’s get real for a second: a wedding without the groom’s suit? That’s like a taco without guac. And since Adam and I are equal-opportunity fashionistas (okay, mostly me, but we’re in this together), we recently embarked on the all-important mission to find the suit for him. So in this post, it’s not just about lace and tulle; sometimes, it’s about fabric swatches, bow ties, and whether my fiancé knows the difference between a shawl lapel and notched (spoiler alert: he doesn’t).

So, cue the cute moments, quirky one-liners, and a surprising amount of suit-related banter.

Step 1: Convincing Adam That Suit Shopping is Actually Fun

Let’s start here: Adam is the love of my life. He’s charming, funny, and has a heart of gold—but let’s just say he’s not exactly an aficionado when it comes to wardrobe choices. His idea of “dressing up” is putting on the one button-down shirt he didn’t spill coffee on. So, when I mentioned the words “suit shopping,” I could see the hesitation on his face (he also put it off for 3 weeks following our initial conversation).

But here’s the thing: I’ve learned the secret to getting Adam excited about anything—bribery, in the form of food. I dangled the promise of brunch after the suit appointment, and suddenly, he was all in. Pro tip: when in doubt, offer bacon.

Step 2: Entering the Suit Wonderland

We walked into the suit department, and it was like a fancy men’s wonderland. There were more shades of grey than a paint store, and don’t even get me started on the lapels and fabrics. Adam immediately gravitated toward the “safe” options—black, grey, something that said “I’m going to an important work meeting” instead of “I’m getting married to the love of my life.”

But Noah, Adam’s brother and a fashionisto himself, wasn’t having it. “Let’s change things up a little, huh?” he said, with a little wink to me. He pulled out a gorgeous slim fit, Calvin Klein dusty blue suit, complete with a subtle pattern. Adam looked skeptical, but I could already tell this was going to be a winner.

Step 3: The Suit Try-On Extravaganza

Adam stepped into the dressing room like a lamb to the slaughter, while I waited outside like a proud fashion coach, ready to cheer him on. A few minutes later, the curtain pulled back, and… wow. There he was, in all his suit-clad glory, looking like the cover model for GQ’s Grooms Who Clean Up Too Well issue.

Adam did a little spin in front of the mirror, pretending to size himself up like a pro. “What do you think?” he asked, with that adorable grin I love so much.

“I think we might need sunglasses at the wedding because you’re shining, babe,” I replied. To be honest, it took every ounce of self-control not to propose to him right then and there.

**Note: the suit coat is a little off in color as they need to order the exact color in Adam’s size—but that will be in next week!**

Step 4: Bow Tie or Traditional Tie: The Great Debate

The next hurdle? The age-old question: bow tie or traditional tie. I was team bow tie all the way because, hello, they’re cute and quirky—just like Adam. But he wasn’t so convinced. “Do I look like a professor who’s going to teach history in this?” he asked.

I gave him a look. “Actually, yeah, kinda like my law and ethics professor I had in grad school—maybe we should rethink this.” I was shocked to be disappointed at my own first personal choice. However, in the end, Adam did find an absolutely gorgeous, traditional, tie (and well okay, my mum found the tie and ordered it from Italy). And I, in turn, promised to stop making dad jokes about it. (But let’s be real, I’m not actually going to stop.)

Step 5: The Final Decision: Dusty Blue All the Way

After trying on a few more suits—some that were, shall we say, interesting (there was a plaid situation that we won’t speak of again)—we came back to the dusty blue number that had stolen both our hearts. It was sleek, timeless, and made Adam look like a dashing 007, minus the Aston Martin.

He looked at me in the mirror and said, “I think this is the one.”

I couldn’t resist. “You mean I’m the one, but sure, the suit’s great too.”

We laughed, and with that, the decision was made. Our sales associate Marina rang us up, we high-fived, and I made sure to snap a mental picture of Adam looking ridiculously handsome. (There may have also been a sneaky selfie or two. For posterity, of course.)

Step 6: Brunch, Because Priorities

As promised, we ended our shopping adventure with brunch. Over seasonal features and espresso martinis, we basked in the glow of another wedding task checked off the list—and, let’s be real, we also basked in the glow of how fantastic Adam looked in that suit.

I’m not saying the suit is what’s going to make our wedding day magical—that’s all about the love and commitment (and maybe the cookie table)—but let’s just say, when I walk down that aisle and see Adam waiting for me in his navy suit and tie, I’m going to swoon. Har’

One Last Look

Suit shopping with Adam was everything I hoped it would be: cute, quirky, a little chaotic, and a lot of fun. Sure, there were moments of confusion (why are there so many types of lapels?) and a near-miss with a plaid blazer, but at the end of the day, we found something that was perfectly him—and perfectly us. Plus, we got brunch, so really, it was a win-win.

Now, onto the next wedding adventure… I think Adam heard me mention “floral arrangements” and has suddenly developed an intense interest in golfing.

Are you getting married or have you ever planned a fall wedding? Let’s chat about it in the comments below and you can also always hit me up on my socials! Which are on Instagram (and connect with me on Threads!), Pinterest, BlogLovin, Twitter (oops I mean “X”, eyeroll), you can also like/follow me on Facebook and connect with me on LinkedIn!

Later babes!

Xx, Bree

P.S. Pssssst! If you love this outfit and want to shop Adam’s closet (at least for this post), you can find these pieces and similar ones here in my LIKEtoKNOW.it shop!

Date Night Chronicles: A Riveting Dive into 'The Psychology of a Serial Killer' with Dr. Rachel Toles

Following my Instagram story detailing Adam and I’s escapades over St. Paddy’s Day weekend a few months back, I had many questions about the show and what my thoughts on it are, and even some inquiries as to “why do you like that stuff?!”—so please, allow me to answer these questions here and now!

Picture this: an evening filled with chilling revelations, intellectual stimulation, and a touch of the macabre. That's precisely where Adam led us when he surprised me with tickets to "The Psychology of a Serial Killer" hosted by the brilliant Dr. Rachel Toles. As a clinical therapist with an insatiable love for delving into the intricacies of the human mind, this live show promised to unravel the enigma behind one of society's most chilling subjects: the psychology of a serial killer. Not to mention, be the perfect intersection of my professional curiosity and personal fascination.

Dr. Toles, a beacon of knowledge in the field of psychology, took center stage in a performance in a performance that left an indelible mark on my curiosity and fascination with the human psyche and surpassed all expectations. From the moment the lights dimmed, she effortlessly guided the audience through the labyrinth of the human psyche, unraveling the mysteries that shroud the minds of serial killers. Her expertise, coupled with a captivating stage presence, transformed what could have been a morbid exploration into an intellectual odyssey.

What set this live show apart was Dr. Toles' ability to bridge the gap between academic insight and riveting storytelling. Dr. Toles' ability to translate complex psychological concepts into a narrative that was both accessible and enthralling. With a unique blend of expertise and theatrical flair, she guided the audience through the intricate web of factors that contribute to the formation of a serial killer's psyche. The live show wasn't a dry lecture; it was a gripping tale that invited the audience to step into the shoes of those who navigate the darkest corners of their minds. Her narratives were not just informative but served as a gripping exploration of the complexities that define deviant behavior. Furthermore, what truly stood out was the integration of real-life cases and psychological theories created a profile of understanding that left me in awe of the intricacies of criminal psychology.

Adam's thoughtful gesture of snagging these tickets elevated the experience, turning it into a shared journey into the depths of the human condition.  The interactive elements woven into the show facilitated not only a deeper understanding but also sparked conversations between us about the factors that shape behavior and the thin line that separates sanity from chaos. Another aspect that elevated the experience was the interactive element woven into the performance. Dr. Toles engaged the audience with thought-provoking questions, challenging us to consider the factors that might influence a person's descent into criminality. This dynamic interaction transformed the show from a lecture into a collective exploration of the human condition.

Despite the inherently heavy subject matter, Dr. Toles seamlessly injected moments of humor and levity, ensuring that the audience remained engaged without sacrificing the gravity of the discussion. The show artfully balanced the gravity of its subject matter with moments of light-heartedness, ensuring that the audience remained captivated without feeling overwhelmed. Dr. Toles' ability to convey her expertise with a touch of humor added a humanizing element to the often macabre discussion, making the experience both enlightening and accessible.

At the request of my fiancé: #MustacheMarch

In conclusion, "The Psychology of a Serial Killer" rose above the conventional boundaries of a live show. Dr. Rachel Toles, with her expertise and theatrical finesse, crafted an evening that left me intellectually invigorated and emotionally moved. For anyone with a passion for unraveling the mysteries of the human mind, this live show is a must-attend – a thought-provoking exploration that lingers in your thoughts long after the final curtain falls. And to Adam, who knew the way to my heart extends beyond therapy manuals and the DSM – thank you for a night of psychologically stimulating theater that I'll treasure forever.

Have you ever wondered about the psychology of a serial killer, and perhaps which one do you find most fascinating? Or do you find this whole dive into the macabre and true crime trend abhorrent? Let’s keep the conversation going in the comments below!

Xx, Bree